I chose the "you're so vain I bet you think this blog is about you" starter for Thursday's Writer's Workshop. I went ahead and just did some free writing to see where the old brain would take me and this was what I got...
It was one of those conversations that you just know you should walk away from. Do not engage. Smile, nod, say it was nice to see you again and walk away. Unfortunately, when alcohol is added, I tend to get stubborn. I had run into an ex at a bar when I was visiting my folks.It started congenially enough. We said hi. He bought me a beer… which was no where near my first for the evening. Things were fine. I kept a bar stool’s distance from him.>And then it started. He moved closer,“So, you married some one who looks a lot like me ya know.”
“Wh… uh… I…. What the hell are you talking about?” Rarely was I at a loss for words but this had truly taken me by surprise.
“Your husband, he looks a lot like me.”
“No he doesn’t”.
“Yeah, he does”
“How do you figure?”
“We both have dark hair”
“As does more than half of the world’s population”
“We’re both tall”
“You’re maybe 5’ 10” He’s 6’ 9” “
“I’m six foot”
“Then so am I, apparently”
“What color are his eyes?”
Really? I was gonna sit through this? Apparently because I kept answering his questions.
“That’s just a fancy word for brown.”
“No it’s not.”
“Ask anyone, we look a like. You have married my doppelganger.”I turned to my best friend who was just sitting there, keeping her mouth shut, letting me suffer.
“Do you think he and Stu look a like?”
“Not even a little.” She said loud enough for him to hear over the bar noise.
“Of course she’d say that. She’s gonna take your side. She doesn’t want to embarrass you.”
“It’s not a side. You don’t look like my husband. At. ALL.”
“If you say so. I just think you should know that I am also married now so you should get over me.”
“Thanks, I’ll work on that.” I mumbled as he walked away.
At that my friend Joe walked over laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
“Oh, I just made an ass of myself.” Nothing new where Joe was concerned.
“What did ya do now?” I asked
“Oh, I just bought some un-known girl a beer because I thought she was you.”
“Poor girl,” I said. Then curiosity got the better of me. “Where?”
He pointed and as I looked over to see who my twin was the ex leaned over and gave her a big wet kiss.
Who’s not over who?